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Isn't it time we normalized period sex and banish the stigma surrounding it?

November 18, 2020
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Sandra Salathe

Let's face it, women put up with an enormous amount of shit. Whether we're trying to crack the elusive glass ceiling, or fight for fair legislation surrounding our own bodies, there's an infinite amount of biased bullshit we as women have to endure. Another item to add to the overflowing list is the stigma surrounding period sex.

The idea the topic is even an issue among certain individuals is purely unfathomable to me. However, I've continuously experienced the stigma enough to understand its existence within today's dating culture. But why does it continue to be a problem within certain circles?

Let's be clear, the stigma surrounding period sex is completely gender-based. It is an arbitrary double standard created by men to shame women into feeling inadequate about something completely natural.

What else is new?

In fact, it isn't just period sex that's the issue. The overall stigma surrounding menstruation in general is one that has been around for centuries, and continues today. Numerous young girls and women are denied basic human rights and respect simply for having their periods every month.

In some countries, women are banned from participating in school and physical activities. Some are forbidden to cook or handle food, even forced into solitary confinement during their cycle. There's also a lack of knowledge in many areas, where women don't have access to basic hygiene products. What's more, there's an inflation of misinformation surrounding menstruation.

Try saying that ten times super fast.

For example, there's the age-old myth using tampons will cause a girl to lose her virginity, or swimming with sharks while on your period will result in an attack. These are the ludicrous statements specifically catered to shame women while on their period.

Period sex is no different.

But here's the thing, if we were to reverse the double standard surrounding period sex, I guarantee we would be having a very different conversation. After all, men don't expect women to feel squeamish over a little semen. In fact, men expect women to feel comfortable when ejaculating on or inside a them.

Honestly, the amount of times I've had a guy ask if he can ejaculate on me during sex is extremely concerning.

So why the double standard over a little blood?

Look at it this way, an average menstrual cycle occurs every 28 days (once a month) and lasts anywhere from 3-8 days. That's a total of 96 days out of the year you could be having sex. In addition, having sex while on your period can actually be a positive thing, both for you and your partner.

For example, blood acts as a natural lubricant, which results in wetter sex, which therefore feels amazing on both ends. What's more, orgasms can sometimes alleviate menstrual cramps. There's also the fact a woman's libido drastically changes during her cycle. I don't know about you, but my libido sky rockets when I'm on my period.

So having to abstain from sex with my partner is not an option for me.

While I've definitely heard women mention they don't exactly feel sexist during their cycle, to me: this seems odd. Having your period should feel empowering. After all, it's what we've been told for years. That starting your period is when "a girl finally transitions into a woman."

So why would that process make someone feel less confident? Again, it's the double standard coming into play. I guarantee you it wasn't a woman who came up with that comment.

Probably the biggest downside to having sex on your period is the mess it can create. This is probably the basis for the overall hesitation. Either that, or your partner is plain sexist. In my humble opinion, any guy who refuses to have sex with you because you're on your period is not worth your time.

Having your period is completely natural and a woman shouldn't feel ashamed because of it.

Thankfully, there are numerous companies that have created products specifically catered to providing a less messy experience during period sex. Companies such as Flex and Intimina have created menstrual-like cups solely based for that very purpose.

Here's the thing, periods are unexpected and often occur during the most inconvenient times. I can't tell you how many times I've started my period during a romantic getaway or anniversary. Hell, I've probably been on my period every Valentine's Day for three years straight. So, feeling self-conscious about having sex during that time shouldn't be uncomfortable for anyone.

And, the more we normalize these conversations, the more we normalize the experience.

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Can tech help female entrepreneurs break the bias?

Women founders continue to come up against common challenges and biases
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Written by Kelly Devine, Division President UK & Ireland, Mastercard

Starting a business may have historically been perceived as a man’s game, but this couldn’t be further from reality. Research shows women are actually more likely than men to actively choose to start their own business – often motivated by the desire to be their own boss or to have a better work-life balance and spend more time with their family.

The recently published Mastercard Index of Women Entrepreneurship 2021 found that in the category of 'Aspiration Driven Entrepreneurship’ – capturing those who actively choose to start their own business – women in the UK surpass men: 60% vs 56%. And Mastercard research from February 2022 found 10% of female business owners started their business in the past two years compared to 6% of men – meaning women were 67% more likely to have started a business during the pandemic.

Yet, there are common challenges that women founders continue to come up against - not least the gender imbalance in the household and long-held biases which are still prevalent.

In the UK, women are almost three times more likely to be balancing care and home commitments than men, and this was exacerbated during the pandemic as the additional barriers of school closures and lockdowns meant that the care time of dependents rose significantly on a day-to-day level for women. In addition, women were less likely to have access to a home office, greatly impacting the work they were able to accomplish when working from home was the only option.

It's also widely known that female business owners are still more likely to struggle to access funding for their business ideas. According to Dealroom, all-women founding teams received just 1.4% of the €23.7bn invested into UK start-ups in 2021, while all-male leadership teams have taken almost 90% of the available capital.

Without financial support, and when juggling significant time pressures both at home and at work, how can women grow their companies and #BreaktheBias (as this year’s International Women’s Day termed it)? What tools or support can save them time and money, and give them the headspace they need to focus on building their business?

With female owned businesses collectively estimating revenue growth of £120 billion over the next five years, solving this problem is bigger than supporting women – it’s about supporting the national economy.

Using tech to level the playing field

There are clearly societal issues at play that need to be resolved. But when we look at the rise in technology businesses during the pandemic, we can plainly see an alternative source of support critical for business growth: digital tools.

A third of female business owners say new technologies will be crucial to the success of their business in the future and one in five say it is the most important thing for business growth.

With new technology comes new ways to pay, create, and work. And yet there are barriers that prevent business owners accessing this technology. Women are significantly more likely to say they want to use more digital tools but don’t know what is best for their business and also more concerned about the security of digital tools.

When technology is adopted by businesses – whether using online accounting solutions or messenger services for communicating with staff – it saves them time, allows them to maintain and grow their customer base, and ultimately increases cost savings and profit.

By drastically improving the training and support that is available to women-owned business to access and utilise technology we will allow these businesses to grow and succeed. And we know there is demand for it.

Research done by the IFC and Dalberg shows that female entrepreneurs are more likely to invest time and money in business development. This includes product development, customer base expansion, and digital tools and training and there are plenty of services available offering this type of support – many of them for free.

One such programme is Strive UK – an initiative of the Mastercard Center for Inclusive Growth – which aims to reach 650,000 micro and small business owners across the UK and empower them with the tools they need to thrive in the digital economy through free guidance, helpful tools and one-to-one mentoring.

Working together with small business experts – Enterprise Nation, Be the Business and Digital Boost – we hope to ensure hundreds of thousands of UK female business owners have the tools they need to succeed and reach their ambitious goals. Because this ambition remains strong in the UK, with female business owners largely optimistic about the future despite the multitude of challenges they are facing. Four in ten say they will grow their business in the next five years – compared to only a third of male business owners – and they’re also 35% less likely than men to say they plan to downsize or close the business.

But if we do not empower female entrepreneurs to access the tools and technology they need to grow, there is a risk this optimism could be misplaced. Support programmes that provide business owners with guidance and mentorship can help ensure this isn’t the case, allowing female entrepreneurs to not only survive but thrive in the months and years ahead.