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Don't believe perfect family photos

November 02, 2021
Indy100-Conversations
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Lauren_Nolan

This week we took the boys down to our local farm for overpriced pumpkins and instagram-worthy pictures. It was a lovely afternoon but after looking through our pictures and then loads from everyone else across Facebook and Instagram, it got me thinking about why pumpkin patch pictures seem to be so obligatory. And that behind every perfect photo is another story; of parents snapping at each other, grumpy kids, fights over who gets to hold the wheelbarrow, and endless requests for snacks.

At one point in the pumpkin field my three year old decided to bolt for the carpark, and upon seeing me chasing him and calling his name he just laughed and ran faster. I managed to stop him before he reached the steady stream of cars milling around but I was scared, cross, and extremely sweaty by the time I got to him. I told him off and he said he hated me. Shockingly, that little interaction wasn't featured in my Instagram post later that evening. Later a family member took a lovely photo of the four of us, although our threenager refused to look at the camera, but what isn't decipherable from that snapshot is the argument my husband and I had before we got in the car and trundled over to farm (nothing too serious but enough for me to pout the entire thirty minute drive). The danger with the superficial, image-based side of social media is that often it doesn't portray an accurate representation of someone's life, or in this case – their day out.

When it comes to children and parenting we seem reluctant to share anything problematic about our offspring. Every picture of them will be an idyllic version of the truth; everyone is smiling, siblings hugging, clean faces, and rosy cheeks. People who see these pictures may think that these kids are always in excellent moods and behaving perfectly, which is almost always untrue. The life we paint on social media is often very different from the reality, and the reasons why we do this are unclear. On some level maybe we portray the life we want to have. Or perhaps we fear that honesty could result in people thinking less of us, or judging us or our children. I know that if I complain about the more difficult parts of motherhood, it doesn't mean that I don't love them fiercely and unconditionally. But I do worry that if I put anything negative on those social media platforms it will seem as though I don't appreciate how lucky I am.

When my youngest was a baby he got up in the night a lot and I was exhausted and grumpy during those months. When I look back on pictures and posts from the time though, all I have are endless snaps of his perfect little face, and all I can think about is how little he was, and remember those lovely newborn cuddles. We often look back fondly on the good parts and let our memory drift over the horrors of multiple night time feeds and 3am despair. I wish I'd taken a few photos of the dark circles under my eyes, or taken a late night breastfeeding selfie. He's only three and already I am glossing over how hard that time was.

I love taking photos of my boys and sharing them; but I'm also very aware that social media can make me feel guilty or inadequate when I see other parents posting things I haven't done with them. If I spot a kid the same age as my eldest age reading books he can't yet, or see someone's kids seemingly behaving impeccably in the pub, I start to worry. This is when I remind myself that firstly – every child is different and developing at their own pace, and secondly – pictures are deceiving and don't tell the whole story. If scrolling through a steady stream of perfect Instagram kids is making you feel a like a bad parent, tuck your phone away for a while and make yourself a cuppa (or pour yourself a large wine!). The perfect family doesn't exist in the real world, I promise.

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Can tech help female entrepreneurs break the bias?

Women founders continue to come up against common challenges and biases
Photo by Christina @ wocintechchat.com on Unsplash

Written by Kelly Devine, Division President UK & Ireland, Mastercard

Starting a business may have historically been perceived as a man’s game, but this couldn’t be further from reality. Research shows women are actually more likely than men to actively choose to start their own business – often motivated by the desire to be their own boss or to have a better work-life balance and spend more time with their family.

The recently published Mastercard Index of Women Entrepreneurship 2021 found that in the category of 'Aspiration Driven Entrepreneurship’ – capturing those who actively choose to start their own business – women in the UK surpass men: 60% vs 56%. And Mastercard research from February 2022 found 10% of female business owners started their business in the past two years compared to 6% of men – meaning women were 67% more likely to have started a business during the pandemic.

Yet, there are common challenges that women founders continue to come up against - not least the gender imbalance in the household and long-held biases which are still prevalent.

In the UK, women are almost three times more likely to be balancing care and home commitments than men, and this was exacerbated during the pandemic as the additional barriers of school closures and lockdowns meant that the care time of dependents rose significantly on a day-to-day level for women. In addition, women were less likely to have access to a home office, greatly impacting the work they were able to accomplish when working from home was the only option.

It's also widely known that female business owners are still more likely to struggle to access funding for their business ideas. According to Dealroom, all-women founding teams received just 1.4% of the €23.7bn invested into UK start-ups in 2021, while all-male leadership teams have taken almost 90% of the available capital.

Without financial support, and when juggling significant time pressures both at home and at work, how can women grow their companies and #BreaktheBias (as this year’s International Women’s Day termed it)? What tools or support can save them time and money, and give them the headspace they need to focus on building their business?

With female owned businesses collectively estimating revenue growth of £120 billion over the next five years, solving this problem is bigger than supporting women – it’s about supporting the national economy.

Using tech to level the playing field

There are clearly societal issues at play that need to be resolved. But when we look at the rise in technology businesses during the pandemic, we can plainly see an alternative source of support critical for business growth: digital tools.

A third of female business owners say new technologies will be crucial to the success of their business in the future and one in five say it is the most important thing for business growth.

With new technology comes new ways to pay, create, and work. And yet there are barriers that prevent business owners accessing this technology. Women are significantly more likely to say they want to use more digital tools but don’t know what is best for their business and also more concerned about the security of digital tools.

When technology is adopted by businesses – whether using online accounting solutions or messenger services for communicating with staff – it saves them time, allows them to maintain and grow their customer base, and ultimately increases cost savings and profit.

By drastically improving the training and support that is available to women-owned business to access and utilise technology we will allow these businesses to grow and succeed. And we know there is demand for it.

Research done by the IFC and Dalberg shows that female entrepreneurs are more likely to invest time and money in business development. This includes product development, customer base expansion, and digital tools and training and there are plenty of services available offering this type of support – many of them for free.

One such programme is Strive UK – an initiative of the Mastercard Center for Inclusive Growth – which aims to reach 650,000 micro and small business owners across the UK and empower them with the tools they need to thrive in the digital economy through free guidance, helpful tools and one-to-one mentoring.

Working together with small business experts – Enterprise Nation, Be the Business and Digital Boost – we hope to ensure hundreds of thousands of UK female business owners have the tools they need to succeed and reach their ambitious goals. Because this ambition remains strong in the UK, with female business owners largely optimistic about the future despite the multitude of challenges they are facing. Four in ten say they will grow their business in the next five years – compared to only a third of male business owners – and they’re also 35% less likely than men to say they plan to downsize or close the business.

But if we do not empower female entrepreneurs to access the tools and technology they need to grow, there is a risk this optimism could be misplaced. Support programmes that provide business owners with guidance and mentorship can help ensure this isn’t the case, allowing female entrepreneurs to not only survive but thrive in the months and years ahead.